Susan Le Clair

Recently, I found a deck of Goddess cards that had been misplaced.

Today’s card was by the Goddess of Perseverance, and reads:

I Earn My Living Doing What I Love

Use this gift when you feel unfulfilled by your present manner of employment.  You created your present work situation and you can create a better one, too.  Take on work that nurtures your mind, body and spirit and that of others.  Whatever you do for a living, you can use your creativity to do it.  Make your life a work of art and your art a work of life.

May I be granted the time to go into my heart and feel whether this is true for me in this moment, and if it is not, why not?  How can I move into a place of nurturing the projects that I have been gifted with, and make THEM my source of income as well as my source of joy.

And so it is…

Well, that feels better. Now that I have completed the first part of the website, I have many feelings. I feel relief now. I feel joyous. I feel more clear. I feel more organized. The overwhelm has subsided, and I can see with a modicum of clarity where I am, currently, and where I would like to go.

I’m less afraid. I’m still feeling awkward, that all my projects (meaning, all the different sides of me) are out there, in the open, all together, for the world to see. If no one looks at it, it matters not. My journey was to put it all out there, in it’s entirety, and I have reached my destination. For this action, anyway.

Now, on to setting some task lists — some manageable ones — and lessen the stress of having 20+ websites and two mini-books to attend to.  All while working in a brand new full-time job, that has nothing to do with any of these projects, and has a learning curve that is straight up!  This ought to be interesting…

Piece of cake.

I am feeling uncomfortable.  I have followed my intuition and created this website, this place — for me, about me, in conjunction with me.  I feel narcissistic and selfish.  I feel unworthy.  I feel incredibly small and wish to be invisible.

My intuition continues to guide me…to the next step.  The big step.  Into acknowledging my life purpose; into expanding on what has already been started; into recognizing my role; into feeling the overwhelm.

I am but a tiny piece of an enormous puzzle, and I have trouble fitting myself into it in this moment.  If I list my initiatives — all started, none finished — does that make me feel inadequate?  Does it urge me on into the doorway of completion?  Does it make me question my guidance?  Does it help me organize my thoughts and actions?

I guess I will see, in time, what this means — what it all means.  I am scared.  I am fearful.  I am elated.  I am motivated.  I will do what I am guided to do, and be filled with gratitude that I am ABLE — that I have the ABILITY — to follow my guidance in each moment.

It is a choice, and I choose it.  Now.

Let us begin.